I have lied. I will not stop writing. I don’t think it’s possible for me to give up something like that. Writing is my one escape. I can’t give that up, but for now, I think I’ll take a break from blogging. I’ve got stuff to figure out, you know? And I don’t want to figure it out on a blog. I can’t hide behind written words anymore. I used to think my blog was the only place that I always told what was on my mind. But I don’t think it was. I think some of it was true, but I was always trying to make everything into a poem. And so it all came out a little dramatic. Even this seems… I don’t know…weird. like not something i would really do, or say. i was trying too hard to be someone..a writer i guess. =) but something that is true? i’ve always liked the name samantha better than rose.


2 Responses to “”

  1. Samantha,

    I hope you find what you are looking for.



  2. i love you rose. sometimes i wish i had been the one who died too, not kelly. then i wouldn’t have to be going through any of this…….but i’m here, you’re here. that’s the plan. don’t have to like it. but do trust it as something above and beyond our understanding.
    i know you probably will roll your eyes at that one.
    but that’s how i get through being without kelly…..not seeing her every day, taking care of her…i just trust, just sigh and say “okay that’s the way it’s supposed to be and i know You know better than I how it all turns out……don’t like it, but i trust You.”

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